Thursday, June 11, 2020

Could We Please End the Civil War?


Undoubtedly because of my intellectual somnolence, it has only recently dawned on me (and, I suspect, a great many white Americans living in the North) that an entire pantheon of Confederate “saints” has long been honored and venerated by the very Union they fought to destroy. I do not believe in censorship, but I DO believe in censURE. And now that I know who Bragg, Benning, and Hood WERE, now that I’ve actually paid notice to those dreary racist icons in Statuary Hall, I certainly want to censURE the less-than-subtle, dog-whistling message this public canonization/idolatry sends to American citizens. 


When decoded, here’s the real message: “Never mind our official doctrine of E Pluribus Unum, racial equality, justice for all, etc., etc. All that is cosmetic—to make folks feel good and keep them calm. In actual fact, there are lots of ‘good’ racists and traitors who deserve to be included in our list of national saints and venerated in our national holy places. We need to be fair. C’mon.”


It’s as if the Vatican had erected statues of demons and devils in St. Peter’s Basilica—right there next to Jesus and Mary and Joseph. As if various supposedly Christian sites had been named Mephistopheles Seminary, Beelzebub Academy, Lucifer Meditation Center, Antichrist Chapel. 


Surely that heretical message should be promptly brought into line with  orthodox doctrine by purging our revered places of racist/secessionist taint.The Capitol should be cleansed, the confederate statues removed to a museum, the confederate names effaced from military sites. Total decontamination is imperative. And now!


Dear Lost Cause Folks: by all means, excercise (if you must) your First Amendment right to discuss, praise, worship, erect altars to these “saints”—who betrayed their oaths to the Constitution just as surely as Judas kissed Jesus. But do this in appropriate, non-official, non-consecrated places—museums, talk radio, a soapbox in the park, your own back yard or a cemetery plot you purchased. Just NOT, please, in the Capitol—our nation’s equivalent of St. Peter’s Basilica—or in military establishments dedicated to preserving that nation. 


Could we please end the Civil War! Now!



Tuesday, June 9, 2020

Desultory Iconoclasm



      About the removal of public statues of historic personages whose character and/or achievements are now considered “dubious.” Well, I am only a very desultory iconoclast. Most of these statues are of limited artistic value anyway, so if they could be dismissed as mere pigeon perches (like most park statuary), I would simply say “who cares?”. But, alas, their function is not purely ornamental, because their PURPOSE is not to serve as space-fillers. Rather, they were erected with the deliberate intent of indicating the approval, even veneration, of the public—for what? Surely for the OVERALL contribution to the general welfare/culture made by the depicted individual. This, therefore, seems to me the best criterion for deciding whether a statue should be erected or removed. Was this person’s OVERALL contribution to the community legitimately worthy of veneration—and (with regard to removal) is his-her contribution STILL seen as positive? By this measure, the statues of Robert E. Lee (in Richmond, VA) and of Edward Colston (in Bristol, England) probably DO deserve to be removed. Lee betrayed his oath to the Constitution, and his primary claim to fame is that he led a rebellion against the United States (a rebellion intended to preserve the institution of slavery). Colston made his fortune as a slave-trader and is—apparently—remembered primarily for that nauseating “feat.” Since neither treason nor slave-trading is today considered a venerable accomplishment, it seems justifiable to remove these statues from places of honor (though, surely, they should be preserved, as articles of historic interest, in museums or archives). Now, about Jefferson and Churchill. Yes, Jefferson was a slaveholder with a black mistress. Not admirable. But his overall contribution to American culture remains, in the popular mind, overwhelmingly positive. Likewise, Churchill is known to have harbored notions of the White Man’s Burden. Not easily condoned. But for his OTHER deeds, he deserves to be admired. In short, let’s not cease to honor those whose overall contributions were, and remain, positive. I vote to keep Jefferson and Churchill, despite their views on race, which we are nonetheless justified in condemning.

Monday, October 14, 2019

Columbus and the Right Side of History


Here’s a Columbus Day reminder to those who moralize about being on the “right side of history”:  the “right” side of history is nothing more than the WINNING side. And Columbus, among others, WON. We do not necessarily have to admire or honor his victory—we can virtuously condemn his immorality—but HISTORY doesn’t care. We act in bad faith when we smugly claim that history will vindicate US because WE are “right.” (Yeah, I know:  I, too, am virtue-signaling here. So, go ahead, cut off my hand.)




Friday, February 15, 2019

Is It Really All About the Benjamins?


In a couple of tweets last week, newly-elected (Muslim) Congresswoman Ilhan Omar suggested, not very subtly, that AIPAC and “Jewish money” were buying the pro-Israel votes of congress members. Surely there were elements of both sanctimony and snark (“all about the Benjamins”) in her remarks. But was her condemnation intended for Jews and Jewishness in general (which would indeed constitute anti-Semitism) or was she merely decrying the political action of an organization funded by some Jews? The distinction matters. It is neither unreasonable nor unjust to disparage policies advocated by a PAC, any PAC, and AIPAC is certainly a very rich and powerful PAC. But it IS unreasonable and unjust to denounce those policies if you are doing so because of WHO advanced them (Jews) rather than because of WHAT outcome was being sought (unqualified support for Israel).

Omar's blunder was twofold. On the one hand (actually the more superficial mistake), her imprecise Twitterspeak inadvertently conjured up a particularly vile anti-Semitic trope--the notion that the Jewish "race" in general is somehow engaged in a worldwide conspiracy to use money (unfairly acquired, it is assumed) to buy political power and thus impose their dominion. Almost certainly, that is not what Omar meant, but it is what many wary students of history heard. And it is undoubtedly what Omar's adversaries gleefully chose to hear and to immediately weaponize against her. She "sounded'' anti-Semitic, and for many, that was enough.


To Omar’s credit, though, as soon as she realized the misunderstandings her careless language had  occasioned, she unequivocally apologized and endeavored to clarify her comments (have you noticed how frequently Twitter users must do this?). While it is pretty difficult to know whether the congresswoman, personally and deep-down, harbors any anti-Jewish prejudice, she has credibly insisted that her Twitter comments were intended to denounce, not Jews in general, but only the policies and monetary machinations of a pro-Israel PAC—AIPAC. Omar surely knows, as should all rational people, that American Jews are not a monolithic bloc of true believers who vote automatically, with ballots and money, for any and all policies approved by AIPAC and the Israeli government. That is nonsense, and Omar, lest she be labeled both anti-Semitic and stupid--was pretty much obligated to acknowledge her embarrassing lapse in judgment.

As I implied earlier, however, Omar's poor judgment about “Jewish money” was only PART of her blunder. To my mind, her bigger mistake was erroneously assuming that the uncritical pro-Israel stance of so many congress members is DUE TO or CAUSED BY the “Jewish money” from AIPAC (and that, in consequence, stopping the flow of AIPAC contributions could somehow stop “bought”
congress members from uncritically supporting Israeli policies). Such fallacious post-hoc reasoning— mere coincidence does not prove causation—can only lead to untrustworthy conclusions. Yes, of course, campaign war chests cheerfully welcome big infusions of AIPAC cash, but in truth, all those lovely “benjamins” are probably more superfluous than decisive—mere frosting for an already-baked cake. That’s because the so-called “bought” politician has most likely already committed himself, a priori and for reasons having little to do with lobby money, to pro-Israel positions.

In short, Congresswoman Omar seems to entertain a simplistic, even naive, understanding of American attitudes toward Israel. Is she not aware that a clear majority of Americans, regardless of their political or religious affiliations, view the state of Israel as a kind of otherworldly, spiritual “child,” conceived and birthed by America in a fit of geopolitical love-making? And doesn’t she see that, like most parents, Americans are predisposed—viscerally and unconditionally— to protecting and supporting their “kid,” even if that means turning an occasional blind eye to the offspring’s misdoings? And, finally, isn’t she aware of the belief held by many Evangelical Christians (a formidable bloc of voters) that a “restored” and secure Israel must be established as a necessary precondition for their much-desired Second Coming of Christ?


Yes, all this seems a bit rich—And yet, and yet...I think it rings true. No, Congresswoman Omar: despite what I consider your admirable intention of denouncing knee-jerk American support for very dubious Israeli policies, your underlying assumptions are wrong: the prevailing pro-Israel attitude has not been "bought'' by Jewish money and it cannot be magically “'unbought'' by regulating or discrediting the AIPAC lobbyists. That is a simplistic Twitteresque explanation for a complex, deep-seated, and largely irrational tangle of emotions, prejudices, beliefs, fears. AIPAC does indeed
possess enormous power to do harm—mostly, I think, to politicians whom it judges “insufficiently” pro-Israel. But even if AIPAC’s monetary temple were to be miraculously destroyed by some latter-day Samson, I doubt that America’s profound, almost religious, loyalty to Israel (identified by many as the divinely ordained New Jerusalem) would be much shaken.


Sadly, therefore, I remain one of those who think it almost impossible to “talk sense” about Israel.  And certainly, I would advise against trying to do so in a 280-character tweet.





* As a fellow Minnesotan, I have been following Congresswoman Omar’s career with interest, and I find her fascinating. She’s not easily pigeonholed: a Somali refugee with an odd marital history, a devotion to hijab (and, I suppose, to Islam), and a very progressive, left-wing social agenda. Not smooth but edgy. A bit cocky, a bit self-righteous, a bit introspective. Really, a work in progress.




Saturday, February 2, 2019

Sarah Sanders: Syphilis and Chocolate in the Best of All Possible Worlds.






Sarah Sanders says that “God wanted Trump to become president.” Well, of course he did. He also wanted Ivan the Terrible to kill his own son and Elvis to die on the toilet. Also the Spanish Inquisition, the 1755 Lisbon earthquake, the 2019 detention camps in Texas and, let us not forget, syphilis. Sanders has become the 21st century version of Dr. Pangloss, who (readers of Candide will remember) lost his nose to syphilis, but still maintained that syphilis was a “good” thing, since the same sailors who brought the disease to Europe from America also brought with them chocolate!  Hence, without syphilis, we wouldn’t have chocolate. You see? It is all God’s will, part of that beneficent, loving package deal that gave us this "best of all possible worlds"--including Donald Trump and teacher/preacher Sarah, herself. Praise the Lord.

Tuesday, December 11, 2018

Brexit : the Revenge of Ireland




Brexit= the Revenge of Ireland. Since the 12th Century the English have imposed their mostly unwelcome rule on some or all of Ireland. But now, the British want to “free” themselves from the rest of Europe—and the only way they can do that without a return to Troubles in Ireland is to ABANDON their last “plantation” in Northern Ireland and withdraw, after 9 centuries, to their own little island—end of Empire, full stop. Delicious irony. Northern Ireland, meanwhile, has to face the truth: these days, they would really be better off being Irish than British. (None of this is likely to happen tomorrow—but it will happen, IMO.) Sic semper tyrannis.


Wednesday, December 5, 2018

Merry Christmas or Merry Yule?


Ho hum. Same old debate: is it OK to say “Merry Christmas”? Of course it is—OR “Happy Holidays” or “Merry Yule,” or whatever. Basically, it’s the INTENDED message that matters. If your greeting is a benign expression of seasonal goodwill, it will almost certainly be accepted as such, even by non-celebrators (rather like “Have a nice day”). But if your tone and manner convey an intent to proselytize or scold—saying, in effect, “The Winter Solstice holiday belongs to ME and to MY religion and screw you if you don’t like it”—there’s a good chance that any non-celebrator you are “greeting” will consider you a belligerent asshole. So, what do you MEAN?